It’s Not Funny Anymore

img_6198I had a great idea for a post.

No really, it would have been super funny. It was gonna be all about “what video games have taught me about surviving a nuclear holocaust”. It would’ve been full of really clever references to games like Fallout or Metro and there was a pretty good joke about how I would be too lazy to leave my fallout shelter. I would’ve taken some shots at Trump because OMG HES SO DUMB and Kim Jong-un because LOL WHAT A STUPID HAIRCUT! It would have been a good piece. Maybe get a few retweets, do decent traffic for the site.

But I can’t fucking do it.

I joke about Trump a lot. Partly because he’s a moron and it’s easy to make jokes about him and partly to make light of a situation that is increasingly terrible as a way of coping with it. But things are starting to get really scary now and maybe the time for jokes is over. I mean… it’s been pretty bad since the beginning, but now it’s gone from “I wonder if he’ll get impeached” bad, to “I wonder if we’ll live to see the upcoming football season?” bad.

North Korea has talked a lot of shit for a really long time. It’s kind of what they do. They talk a really big game but for the most part people know it’s all show. They recently stated that America would “pay the price for it’s crime… thousands of times.” in response to recent sanctions. Now that’s a pretty scary thing to hear. Recent evidence suggests that they have nuclear weapons that are capable of reaching our shores. This is a serious situation in need of a level headed but firm response. So how did the President of the United States respond to that threat? With the following quote:

“North Korea best not make any more threats to the US. They will be met with fire and fury like the world has never seen.”

The United States has been in a nuclear stand off before, but this is different. It’s one thing to hear apocalyptic threats from a madman across the Pacific, but now our very own madman is threatening nuclear war in response. That’s scary as hell. All of a sudden I don’t care so much about Sean Spicer hiding in the bushes, or even about Trump and Vladimir Putin being BFFs. Now I’m worried about a devastating war between two powerful maniacs that would leave millions of people dead. 6 months ago that seemed like a thing people joked about half-heartedly when they spoke about Trump being the man with his “finger on the button”. But it’s not a hypothetical situation anymore. This is real. And it’s terrifying.

I’m incredibly grateful that my daughters are young enough that I don’t think they really grasp the gravity of what’s going on, because if they did I wouldn’t know how to calm those fears. I’m having a hard enough trying to calm my own. This is uncharted territory and the truth is that none of us knows what will happens in the next few months, weeks, or even days. I’m scared for my children, I’m scared for my family and I’m scared for the entire world.

I’m supposed to just go on with my life now. I’ll be at a convention this weekend, smiling and laughing with the folks that I meet. But it’ll be hard. It’ll be hard to set all of this aside and pretend that everything is okay when nothing could be further from the truth. But what other choice do I have? Give in to the fear and uncertainty? Lock myself in a room and rock back and forth in a fetal position? That’s not really an option. We have to keep moving forward. So I’ll smile and I’ll hand out buttons and I’ll make those stupid wiener jokes.

But right now my family is on the way home and all I want to do is hug them when they walk through the door. And hope that I get to do that again tomorrow, and the day after that, and for as many tomorrows as I can have.


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